Sunday, August 26, 2007

LONG ROAD HOME : HYESUNG’S ROAD HOME

LONG ROAD HOME : HYESUNG’S ROAD HOME

The clock on her dashboard said it’s already 11 past 12, and all the lights in their house are already turned off. “Sungie, must be sleep already” she told herself. Silently she thanked the heavens for giving him to her. His responsible boy….no…young man she corrected herself. His almost a head taller than her now and from the looks of it he might grow some more.

She parked as silently as she could. Their garage was made for two cars, but so far Sungie does not seem too inclined to have his own car. This made life easier for her because then she did not have to suffer the same anxiety suffered by other parents with teenage kids.

Turning the lights on, she found him asleep on the sofa surrounded by his books and magazines. She would have left him there because she knew that once he wakes up he would make his way upstairs to his room on his own. But something caught her eye. A thick book with a mixture of characters and letters written in front, a Korean English Dictionary. Slowly she flipped through the other books and magazines, half of them are in Korean too.

“His learning Korean” she silently told herself. She could feel her knees shaking. She knew that sooner or later his going to fly the coop. He only has a few months left in high school and she knows he got what it takes to get into an Ivy League school. His too good to be stuck in a community college, but Korea is too far she told herself.

She felt him move beside her. Getting up even before opening his eyes, “Mom is that you?”

“Yes, honey it’s me, did I wake you up?”

“Nahhh”

With his eyes half opened now, he saw that his mother was holding the dictionary he just bought that morning. Without saying a word he took it from her hand.

“Would you like to eat? I made some crab soup”

“Sure I would love that”

Together mother and son walked their way to the kitchen. Hyesung half feeling his way towards the kitchen because he is not fully awake yet. His partially on autopilot now. But Samantha knew that he’ll be fully awake by the time the soup is heated. The soup smells nice and the French toast he made to match looks just as heavenly. It sometimes surprised her at how good he is at the kitchen. She’s a full time career woman and part time soccer mom. Running you own law firm is not an easy task and you just have to sacrifice some things. In her case she sacrificed the delight of home cooked meals to easy to prepare and more convenient microwave foods. Until now she can’t figure out how her Sungie learned his way around the kitchen. He definitely did not learn that from here.

“That looked good!” Samantha tried to sound enthusiastic.

“I’m glad you like whatever I prepared for you”

“Even if it’s just burnt toast you know I’ll eat so long as you’re the one who made it”

“I never burnt toast before”

“Yes you did”

“I did?”

“When you were 7, it was your first time to try to cook me breakfast”

“Oh that….I did not know how to use the toaster yet”

“But I still ate it didn’t I”

Hyesung without prompting leaned his head on her shoulder.

“What are you going to do when I’ m gone?”

“Eat plastic?” Samantha tried to make light of things.

“I’ll be off to college soon….”

“Yeah I know…..when that time comes I’m going to miss you…”

“No mom…what I mean is…”

“Honey you don’t need to explain anything…you’re a responsible son…I trust your judgment”

“I didn’t mean that…”

“Honey, if what you want is to travel to Korea before you go to college. Then go ahead. I won’t stop you. I’m sure your Dad will be happy to finally have a chance to have you stay with him”

“I want to go to college there”

This surprised Samantha, she knew that Hyesung has been studying hard because his aiming for a place in an Ivy League school. He never mentioned anything about wanting to move to Korea.

“Mom, I know…it’s just that…”

“Honey, I’m honestly surprised…..but why…?.....Don’t bother explaining…I mean….you never said anything about wanting to study there”

“I know, it’s just that…you know I’m interested in going into business right…and you said Dad is a very good businessman”

“Yes”

“I just thought I could work as an intern for him while getting my degree. To get my foot at the door before anybody else”

“Honey you don’t need to explain anything”

“I need to tell you, I don’t want you to be upset at me for not even trying to get into Harvard like what we’ve always planned for.”

Samantha was speechless for a while.

“Mom, your not mad at me right?”

“Of course not, why would I be. I know there are very good universities there too!”

“But not as good as Harvard?”

She’s a Harvard alumni and pretty proud of it.

“Well yes, but where you study can only get you so far. Sometimes one’s perseverance and hard work is more important and of course how you use your grey cells are important too.”

Hyesung laughed at his mother’s attempt at humor.

For a while mother and son silently sat together with Hyesung picking on his mother’s food once in a while.

“Do you think he would like me?”

“Who you’re Dad?”

“Yes”

“Of course!”

“I’m scared”

“There’s nothing to be scared of …..his not going to win Father of the Year Award but I’m sure he’ll be happy to have you with him”

“He never calls”

“That’s because his a busy man, but at least he never forgets to send you gifts during your birthday and Christmas”


“It’s not the same”

“I know, but hey at least you don’t need to explain to him why you want a new oven for your 10th Birthday”

Hyesung giggled.

“I just wished…”

“I know, I’m sorry for not choosing a better man for a father for you!”

“That’s not what I mean”

“I now wished I made more effort to be there for you”

“Mom, you were always there for me”

“But I was always late”

“But you were there”

“Please don’t blame your Dad for not being there, he would have, but we live halfway around the world from him”

“ I know”

And then without prompting Hyesung hugged his Mom.

“I love you. You’re the best mother for me”

“ I know honey….but I am not the best cook am I”

“ No that’s me!”

Mother and son laughed at their own joke.

“I’m going to miss you when you go away”

“I’m going to miss you too……..who’s going to cook for you now?

“Well I do know how to cook”

“Mom heating something on the microwave does not count”

“Don’t worry about me too much….I’m a big girl I can manage”

“If ever I decided to stay there for good, will you get mad at me?”

“Honey that’s silly! Why would I do that, I’ll feel bad but you know I’ll never be mad at you”

“I just want to know that. If ever I do that will you come and visit me?”

“Of course, not even your father can keep me away”

“I don’t think he stand a chance with you!”

“You bet!...want me to call him for you?”

“You’re going to do that?”

“I’ll tell him you want to go there to study and he better make sure his women treat my baby right or I’ll sue his pants off!’

“Mom, did I ever tell you your scary, no wonder Dad stayed so far away!”

Samantha said nothing to this.

“Mom, I’m sorry I did not meant it that way”

“There’s no need to apologize dear, your father and I. I don’t think we’ll last anyway. I’m too tough for him and honestly I don’t think he can stand to leave Eric to Cho. His not the best husband in the world but I know he’s a good father”

“Why? Because he refused to leave his real wife for you because of his son?”

“No because he acknowledged all of you as his own. Very few men of his standing would actually go out of their way to that!”

“But it’s not right to have so many sons from different women”

“Yes, but nobody’s perfect. He probably thought it was the most important thing in the world….to acknowledge his flesh and blood. Why don’t you go to bed. I’ll clean this up”

“Are you sure?”

“Honey I do know how to wash the dishes’

****************

Samantha put down the phone and looked at the clock, almost 3 in the morning. She did not realize she has been talking to Lee Kwan Dae this long. They’ve never talked to each this long. Yes they communicate on a regular basis because of Sungie but she herself was surprised at how excited he sounded when she told him about Hyesung’s plan to go to Korea to study and to apply as an intern in his company. Try as he might he can’t hide his excitement. He immediately asked his secretary to call Universities to check on requirement for acceptance.

Despite her tiredness, Samantha couldn’t sleep. The thought of him leaving so soon upsets her. Slowly she made here way upstairs. The house would feel so empty without him. Mentally she calculated the cost of getting an apartment in the city. The mother in her admonished her for even thinking as if her son is not coming home anymore. She told herself that this is just a passing thing. He grew up here, all his friends are here. Once he realized how different the culture is he’ll come back home. This little spark of hope is enough reason to hold on to this house she knows that. But the realist in her knows that little spark of hope cannot win against the wind of reality. Her Sungie has always longed for his father. He doesn’t say much but she knows how much he wanted to experience being close to his Dad. She can see it in the way he would look away when he sees his friends with both parents in attendance during school activities. He would always run to the phone when he knows it’s his Dad on the other line and the way he would try to hide his disappointed look when his father couldn’t stay on the phone long enough for him to say everything he wants to say. She sometimes feels guilty for letting him grow up without a father. Sure there are many other willing men who wouldn’t mind having him for a step son but somehow Samantha has always felt satisfied with her life. She’s always been an independent career woman, she never planned for a family and Sungie was not part of her plans. But the moment she learned she was pregnant with him her motherly instincts kicked in. She never regretted having him and can’t imagine life without him.

“Better start looking for a nice small apartment Sam, and better yet start learning to cook. Kwan Dae will not let him go so easily now that he has his chance at having Sungie close to him” she told herself silently.

CHAPTER 2

Hyesung scanned the crowd looking for a familiar face but did not find any. He is beginning to regret coming here now. Sure it sounded exciting and easy at first but the more he thinks about it during the flight the more he realized how absurd it is to move away so far. His mother offered to accompany him but he refused. He knows how busy she is, especially since she has to move house and put the extra furniture’s in storage and all the other nitty gritty detail that needs to be taken care of. He was hurt a little when she said that she’ll be moving to a small apartment near her office once he goes to Korea, he felt that she does not want him to come back. But he knows his mother does not mean it that way and besides the house will be too big for her, it was even too big for both of them. Thinking of her now, coming home to an empty apartment made him feel guiltier than he already is for moving so far away.

He saw a big man holding a small banner with his name on it. Slowly he made his way towards the burly man. He can feel his knees slightly shaking. “Calm down” he admonished himself. He knew the possibility of his father taking time out to pick him up from the airport is really small, he knows how busy he is. But somehow he hoped for it. Seeing that his father is nowhere in sight, Sungie tried his best to hide his disappointment.

He recognized the man as Mr. Ho Dong. He has met him before when his father came to the United States for some international convention. He and his mom met him for dinner; it was the first time he ever laid eyes on his father. He remembered it as if it was just yesterday. His father looked so dapper to him then. He was wearing a nice coat and tie, just like what the friends of his mom wear during formal occasions except that he wears them better. He was just 6 and somehow thought his father was like the father of his friends who lets them sit on their lap. He did that and he did let him sit on him briefly before he told him to sit down on his chair properly because dinner will be served soon. He was so disappointed then. He never saw his father again after that except for the occasional photos he would send and the sporadic phone calls he makes monthly. Sure he never forgot his birthday, and he always sends him a gift for Christmas and whenever he wins something in school.

“Mr. Hyesung?’ Mr. Ho Dong approached him with so much formality that Hyesung wanted to laugh at him but stopped himself. He knew how formal Koreans can be and he has to remind himself that he is still half Korean despite the fact that he was born and raised in New York City.

Hyesung saw that Mr. Ho Dong was not alone. A young man only a few younger than him was with his father’s Head of Security. Hyesung did not have to search in his memory for long who this young man is because he was introduced by Mr. Ho Dong immediately after he said his greetings.

“Mr. Hyesung this is Mr. Jinnie, he is your youngest brother”

“Nice to meet you” Junjin said to him shyly.

“Yeah…I know you, Dad sent me pictures of you, hey…Mom sent you a gift by the way. It’s in one of my bags, I‘ll give it to you later.”

“Thank you, Hyesung Hyung”

“Naahhh….it’s nothing and call me Sungie, everybody does”

“If that’s what you want you can call me Jin”

Very soon Hyesung was thanking himself for at least trying to learn Korean before coming here. Because it turns out that Junjins knowledge of the language is pretty limited. He do understand English but speaking the language is a totally different story. Anybody listening in on their conversation would find it really amusing because they are conversing in two totally different languages with Hyesung speaking in English and Junjin speaking in Korean. Once in a while Hyesung would get lost on the words used by Junjin but still it made him feel better to know that at least somebody likes him to be here.

The travel from the airport to his father’s house was pretty long. Both Junjin and Hyesung spent most of the time talking, with Junjin doing most of the talking. He talked mostly about soccer and how his team in school is doing and how they might have a chance to get into the national finals. Hyesung who is too weary now was thankful for the idle talk; he was in fact very nervous about meeting his father and other half brothers.

**********

Eric silently watched from his bedroom window as the two identical cars were parked in their driveway. He knew one of those cars is his and he has a faint idea for whom the other car is for. His mom has already talked to him about the arrival of another brother. Eric knew that he has no reason to hate him and it’s not his fault that they share the same father. He should be used to it by now but still he sometimes still resent his father for siring so many other sons from so many different women.

Another car drove into the driveway. Upon seeing who the arrivals where, Eric stood away from the window and took a deep breath, he knows what’s going to come next, he will yet again be introduced to another brother. Silently he got out of his room, passing by Minwoo’s room he knocked to warn him that Hyesung has arrived.

Eric saw the lanky boy carry some of his own luggage into the house. He is just a few months younger than him, he has to remind himself. Hoping that he wouldn’t be noticed he took that few moments to look at his foreign brother. That’s what his mother addresses him. He was tall, almost as tall as him, but his features are delicate almost like a girl.

His revelry was cut short when Minwoo intentionally bumped into him. Minwoo did not apologize but instead just grinned at him. Eric sometimes wonders what it is in Minwoo that made him welcome any additional brother so openly. He is almost like Junjin in a sense that he doesn’t seem to mind having to share their father with yet another son.

‘President Lee!” Both he and Minwoo stood in attendance when they heard Jung Hwan the butler addressed their father.

Eric was silently glad that their father was present for the introduction. He knows how awkward it can get.

Lee Kwan Dae silently patted Hyesung in the back. Hyesung acknowledged him by awkwardly bowing his head. Kwan Dae has to try really hard not to show how happy he is that Hyesung is finally going to live with him.

“How was your flight, you must be tired”

“It was ok, I got to sleep because Mom booked me in first class”

“That’s good to hear. You’ve met your brothers already?”

“We just arrived a few minutes ahead of you” Hyesung answered hoping he wouldn’t be offended by such informality.

Looking at his four sons, Lee Kwan Dae has to think for a while how to introduce them but was distracted by a running figure that bumped into Hyesung.

‘I’m sorry, I know I’m late!!!” Dongwan was still trying to catch his breath while apologetically patting the lanky boy whom he guesses must be his half brother Hyesung.

“”Sorry for bumping into you, I’m the…..”

“Fourth…..” Minwoo finished his sentence.

“No…his not the fourth his third, his older than you by a few months.” Eric corrected him.

“Ok his third and I’m fourth, I’m Minwoo by the way and this is Eric…his OLDEST”

“I know that, I’m Hyesung by the way but I won’t mind if you call me Sungie, my mom always does. And I think I’m second.”

“Naahh, I’m second” Dongwan told him.

“Actually his right, his second and your third, Minwoo is fourth and Jinnie is the youngest and hopefully the last” Lee Kwan Dae decided to correct them himself.

“Really? Are you sure” Minwoo knew he can be too cheeky at times but he just couldn’t resist not saying that.

“Well do you want another one?” Lee Kwan ask them all.

“NO!!!” they said in unison.

No comments: